The Apprentice

Nine weeks I have been watching this programme and not once has it moved me to actually voice my opinion to any passer by who may want to view and go ‘my oh my I strongly agree with that, lets give this young whipper snapper a dandy new job.’ Now that the begging is over. This was a shocking episode and I am very quickly learning to hate Mr/Sir I should still be on a council estate and its just by pure chance or because I possibly sold my soul to the devil that I currently don’t Alan Sugar (not his actual title). I am choosing to ignore the fact that tasks that they are set are gradually becoming more ludicrous, actually no I am not. I’m not 100% sure what the job is that they are going to be doing by the end of this programme but so far it seems to be that its going to involve ice cream making, wedding dresses, fish…more food…the rest escapes me now…and then this week throws cinematography, script writing, branding, designing, lighting and directing into the mix. I cant help but think that Amstrad are reaching into the porn business, lets face it they need to, its not like there shiny boxes of tricks are selling like hot cakes any more is it?

My rant continues after the break.

So this week they are set the task of making an advertising campaign for tissues. Hunky dory, after the teams are mixed up so the final three are on one side and the guys who will be bumped off for the next couple of weeks are put on the other, they all run off and make their adverts and tissue boxes and print advertising.

Raefs team bound off and creates a campaign for a higher end product. And the advert is surprisingly well shot it looks pretty and although bland could have been shown on tv.

Alex’s (spit) team, I say team and I mean him and his equally ‘Landan’ scar faced male Lee worked as a team whilst ignoring Lucinda and anything she had to say. Alex is a misogynistic spoilt brat pig who cannot stand any one who is well spoken, I want him never to speak again, ever. But that’s beside the point, or is it? I don’t really know any more. Well any way they created an in your face ‘brand power advert’ with the worst acting outside of Buffy season six with an ugly orange box which no self respecting human would have on display in their home.

And you know which one Alan liked the most, the fucking ugly Alex team tissues. Unless you watched the programme which I think you should do over at iplayer there are no words to describe how awful old scar did in the pitch, there was a script and the words ‘female genre’ used at one point. But Alan loved it, the tissues were shown in the advert alot and this is a good thing, poor Raef was berated for not showing the product. I’m sorry what do Cadburys show their chocolate in adverts at the moment, have Orange or 02 ever shown a mobile phone in Sony Bravia adverts do you see an abundance of televisions, NO YOU DO NOT, grrrrrr. *breadths* Any way it all ends with Raef being kicked out and not because he did anything wrong but because he is not blokey enough for Alan and not sexing him up which two faced, back stabbing, evil weesil Sophocles must be doing to have survived this long.

and the brand power adverts are so god darn awful no one has bothered putting them on youtube so here is a link to the brand power site.

I know which one i prefer how about you?