Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull review

Lets start with a synopsis then put the review after the break. It all starts in Area 51 and Indy has been adultknapped by a group of evil evil Russians who want to find a highly magnetic box that contains a bucket load of mysteries and Indiana Jones is one who can unravel them. This leads to globe trotting joy with plenty of whip snapping and the well known theme tune thrown in at every given opportunity.

Follow me after the break after that extremely short and spoiler free synopsis, go team me!

I thought this film was awesome. I have read more than one review where people are expressing how blah the whole event was, and how needless it was and how it added very little to the Indiana Jones mythology. To them I say shut up, Indiana Jones has always been a gay ol action packed romp. I say that with only vaguest memories of Indiana Jones, I was never the biggest fan and I was the most excited person in the world when the prospect came along that I would be spending my hard earned money on this particular cinema trip, but i would give it a joyful two thumbs up.

The script is a little bit hokey but if you are going to see this and expecting beautiful poetic soliloquy’s, then you have come to the wrong place as the words only function is to move the cast to the next explosive set piece. And the set pieces are beautiful, alot of money has gone into to make every single scene look gorgeous, never befor have I thought I would love to see an atomic blast, but the way the sun shone through a mushroom cloud as Indy looked on was breadth taking. Then the final temple is incredible, and I cant say anything with out spoiling the whole plot, but I want a room with aliens on thrones now.

There is the issue that Shia Lebouf is in this film because I do hate him so much, so so much, so much. But he has very little to do other than have twat like hair and repeatedly get the shit kicked out of him which did give me a a warm glow each time he started to bleed.

So if you want to go and be entertained and your brain not to be taxed then I would reccommend this film 90%. The shit romance between Indy and some middle aged woman falls flat but we will put that down to George Lucas being inept at writing scripts especially one that involve love. I am looking at you Star Wars and ‘I don’t like sand its so course, its not like you, your skin is smooth.’ no one ever wants to be compared to sand.